Friday, September 3, 2010

Laycox and I

Laycox loves that soft approach and smooth style. He keeps telling me to enjoy the gentle flow I follow. I can’t stand these Comforting words. Only Thinking about the pain in my knee’s and the harshness of the slope, I choose to ignore him. What choice do I have. But yet he controls the doing and enjoys the world none the less. He hates the cruising.and tries to convince me into more of a technical challenge.


Him I can’t stand he has no say in this world of mine. But I never knew just how much control he holds till I found myself on that harsh slope once again. The way he thinks can’t be said for anymore. He is nearly pathetic in his thinking and completely insane in his logic. I can not resist but to think this panic can’t continue. This betrayal of our trust I can no longer stand.


I can no longer say who decides which path to take; I hope to take it out of free will.

12 comments:

  1. "aycox loves that soft approach and smooth style. He keeps telling me to enjoy the gentle flow I follow. I can’t stand these Comforting words. Only Thinking about the pain in my knee’s and the harshness of the slope, I choose to ignore him."

    the pains of skiing versus the rewards of skiing. very well done.

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  2. "I hope to take it out of free will." fighting with yourself and then bam it hits you this is you. very cool

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  3. Him I can’t stand he has no say in this world of mine.

    Whose world is it really?

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  4. I can no longer say who decides which path to take; I hope to take it out of free will.

    I like this because it shows that the loser of this conflict is going to be taken against his will to follow the winner.

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  5. The back and forth you do in your writing is very appeasing to listen to. I don't know exactly what it is but there is something in your writing that makes me want to listen to you more.
    "But yet he controls the doing and enjoys the world none the less. He hates the cruising.and tries to convince me into more of a technical challenge."

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  6. "This betrayal of our trust I can no longer stand."

    putting betrayal into the story brings a interesting perspective to the reader. Its like you mistrust yourself yet, are the one betraying the trust.

    smiley face.

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  7. The tension between thinking and doing comes across in a way that wants me to know more. It's that intriguing. I love this moment,

    He keeps telling me to enjoy the gentle flow I follow. I can’t stand these Comforting words. Only Thinking about the pain in my knee’s and the harshness of the slope, I choose to ignore him.

    There is pain in the knee but love of the rush, the slope. That's the contradictory beauty. Well done.

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  8. "Him I can’t stand he has no say in this world of mine" I like this quote because it show the struggle of the relationship the hatred almost and It really grasped the assignment well!

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  9. "This betrayal of our trust I can no longer stand." I like this line because it sounds like there was once an understanding and happy medium for the two of you, but it's becoming uneven and poses a challenge for you because Laycox is taking over.

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  10. "I can no longer say who decides which path to take; I hope to take it out of free will."

    I like the ambiguity you left at the end. You leave it like the ability to enjoy the slopes is out of your control, in a very genuine way.

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  11. I love how this is so infused with sensitivity and feeling. This is really raw and rare, I love it just for that!
    The way in which youre fighting yourself really shows the reader how much time and work you put into this piece. I really really like this Nick! Great job. :)

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  12. I really like the comparison between yourself and your inner self. Your inner self likes the danger and your outer self wants to take it easy.

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