Lelon and I
Lelon loves philosophy; studying ideas, asking questions, never having a set view on anything because everything can be proven both wrong and right- these are things that intrigue her. Yet I hate philosophy. I cannot stand it when she starts asking questions of “universal justice” and “reality” because what use is this to me? All these things are questions that cannot be answered. What use is there in trying if you will never feel satisfied that you are right? Moreover, these are questions that remind me of a time I would rather forget. Yet she insists: “Can you prove you exist?” she asks as I brush my teeth in the morning. “Are humans capable of world peace?” as I sit down to breakfast. “What if those people behind you are not people at all, but purple and green tentacled aliens who only appear to be human when you turn around and look at them?” as I enter class. These are questions I can’t be bothered to grapple with, yet those occupy the whole of my being though I don’t want to face them.
She makes sure they are constantly present in my mind, weighing on me until I face them head on, creating more tension and inner turmoil than if I had kept suppressing them. She makes sure that I come to an answer that I feel content with, and then she makes sure that my contentedness does not last. What does she have to do besides slowly drive me to the brink of insanity? This is what she thrives on.
More than philosophy, this is truly what she enjoys; seeing the inner struggle to answer the question that has no answer is her greatest joy in life.
/love.
ReplyDeleteThe Christina I know is this wonderfully deep and complex character that always has the "just" answer for everything. I ADORE how that the end connects your inner you to your outer you.
If that isn't what your trying to convey, ignore me. C:
I really like this. It explains the struggle that you and Lelon go through in a way that is sometimes entertaining-“What if those people behind you are not people at all, but purple and green tentacled aliens who only appear to be human when you turn around and look at them?”- but really just descriptive in a way that really makes you feel the frustration.
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